For today’s post I wanted to share a bit of a reflection on marriage, and what happens after the wedding, for an intercultural couple such as myself and my husband. First, it took some time for me to sort of “come down” from getting married in India, the civil ceremony, and the American ceremony. Though this time of year last year was largely a happy and positive time, it has taken me some time to unpack all that happened during that frenetic pre-wedding and wedding time. Perhaps more importantly, the implications it had on moving forward. Namely I am referring to the wedding in India. The best moments that I hold in me are those where R & I locked hearts, minds, and souls in perhaps on of the most unique ways possible for any couple. However, there were a lot of times I look back now and see how powerless I felt in the vortex of commotion and chaos that surrounded me for the 10 days in India and beyond. For the past three years I have really tried to be a pleaser, to try and take the high road, look past faults, and to make a good impression with R’s family. Now that we are married, and have been for a year, I’m finding myself less willing to please and worry about the impression I am making. I feel that marriage is a whole new deal, a real serious deal, and although it is tremendously rewarding and satisfying, it requires a lot of work and patience. And, you have to really be yourself, really be true to yourself, to do marriage well and wholeheartedly. I was really eager to please everyone in R’s life, but now I am mostly eager to forge and protect myself, R, and our marriage first and foremost…
More to come…
